Archive for the 'university' Category


Shit i do when i should write term papers, #24: Fix my phonograph. My academic career is in danger, but i can play my beloved Arik Einstein, Matti Caspi, Broken Social Scene and Genesis records.

How to write a Humanities paper:

  1. Find an interesting article.
  2. Summarize it.
  3. Read all of its footnotes.
  4. Summarize the articles cited.
  5. Print out the result, without editing.
  6. Cut the paragraphs of printed text and put the scraps in a bag.
  7. Shake the bag gently.
  8. Then take out the scraps one after the other in the order in which they left the bag.
  9. Copy the contents of the scraps in that order into a new document.
  10. Add a bibliography.
  11. Your work will be like you and your infinitely original studies in Humanities.

Optional: Translate the document using Google Translate to Belarusian and then back to your language.

Lenin 55!

I am sitting in the library of the Hebrew University in Jerusalem. The complete works of Lenin are on a shelf in front of me. Four shelves, to be precise: Fifty-five volumes plus a two-volume index and the selected works in English – in mere forty-five volumes. I wonder: Did the university actually buy it or did the children of a dead communist donate it to clear some space at home?

OpenOffice WIN

WIN: I sent a university paper as an OpenOffice odt file and the teacher accepted it! For great justice!


I helped an Arab student who does not know Hebrew well and who is not computer-savvy to find a book in the Mount Scopus library.

The book was in Arabic and she did not know how to search in Arabic in “Aleph“, the library’s search system. In the library computer it was possible to type in Arabic, but the letters were not printed on the keys, so i took out my laptop and opened the Arabic keyboard map. We sat together, and slowly typed the Arabic names (apparently the al- article shouldn’t be typed.). At the end we found the book.

That was yesterday. Today she brought me Baqlawa to the class.

… But they say there is a war between us.

Footnotes, part 2

Aharoni Manual of Style, paragraph 393: Do not add a very long footnote to the first sentence of the article.

Gender Studies

In most Hebrew language courses a significant majority of students are female. The only exception is the course “Medieval Hebrew: Piyyut and Spanish Poetry”, which has 70% of male students. Calling this course “the hardest” wouldn’t be very objective, but it is safe to say that the Even-Shoshan Dictionary is not very useful for understanding the texts that we read there.

In Linguistics courses i took the ratio of male-to-female students was pretty much even. The same goes for “Spanish for beginners”.

However, in the “Advanced Portuguese” course all students are male.

(Hi, Jane.)